seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
