I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
