He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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