Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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