how can u be prego again
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
