You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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