it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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