i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
40s are totally the cure
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize