You're so nebulous sometimes
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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