Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize