I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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