There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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