you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize