if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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