Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
the raccoons are back...
Randomize