dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
