If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
