But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize