k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
