I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
