i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
