I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I am available for nakedness
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
