Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
