It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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