I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
