Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
