On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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