Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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