At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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