And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
