Don't you send me to vm
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
please come you make the beer taste better
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize