We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
