Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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