I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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