my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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