so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
