i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Randomize
