this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize