I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
