There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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