Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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