Just cropdusted the office
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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