She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
