we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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