I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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