Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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