hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
