Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize