So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
