is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
