I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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